Oh, To Be A Doctor.....

A funny thing happened Thursday morning. At precisely 9:30 a.m. the doorbell rang. Not expecting anyone, I didn't answer it. About a minute later, it rang again. This time I looked out the window but did not recognize the car in the driveway. Unless you are a really persistent door-to-door salesperson - in which case, you shouldn't be ringing my doorbell anyway, due to the "No Soliciting" sign posted directly next to the button - or some creepy stalker who can't get a clue to leave, two rings is usually the limit for any normal person. That is the norm, right? Or am I just ignorant and rules of etiquette proclaim one ring to be the proper number?

But no, the doorbell rang a third time.

This time I actually walked to the door to find our service coordinator, Tracy, with First Steps (This is the organization through which Milla receives speech therapy and in other parts of the country it is called Early Intervention), standing there waiting for me to let her in for our quarterly appointment we scheduled weeks ago. Yes, it was in my planner. Yes, I kept reminding myself all week long, but apparently only up until the day before the appointment and then it somehow escaped my thought process never to be recovered again because, by around 9:34 Thursday morning, I was about to wail on someone for ringing my doorbell so many times and not leaving me alone.

Embarassed and apologizing all over the place, I opened the door and poor Tracy came in.

This post isn't about my lovely fifteen minute appointment (nearly five minutes of which was taken up by my avoiding the doorbell ringing) with Tracy and all the paperwork we ran through in that short period of time, but rather, what followed afterwards. However, it was a bit humorous and worth mentioning the thought that I had an unexpected arrival of a serial killer or serial salesperson or serial stalker and how I was avoiding opening the door to such a person when, all along, I should have remembered it was the person who was clearly marked in pen on my planner for that morning at that specific time.

That said, I do need to mention one piece of paperwork that is pertinent to this story. One of the items Tracy brought was a diagnosis sheet that I needed to sign off on that would then be sent to our family doctor for him to confirm that yes, Milla has developmental delays and her need for speech therapy services is warranted.

Now I need to backtrack a little bit here because this is the part where I thought it was odd that Milla's doctor needed to sign off saying he had diagnosed her with these delays because 1)He had never diagnosed her in the first place when we began getting speech services several months ago and 2)Her need for services was first determined and is determined by the speech and occupational therapists who serve as evaluators for First Steps.

Are you confused yet? Basically, when we first started to notice Milla was not talking at a level as a typical child her age, we contacted First Steps. They sent two evaluators (whose degrees are in speech pathology and occupational sciences) out who sat down with Milla and I for around two hours and determined that Milla did indeed show some weaknesses and delays in enough areas to qualify her for services. Our family doctor was never involved in the process.

BUT - there is always a "but"....

But despite the fact that the two evaluators felt she needed services, in order for Milla to receive services, our doctor had to sign off on this one sheet I am talking about. Apparently, around six months ago, our doctor did so with no questions asked.

Fast forward to this week and the phone call I received yesterday from Tracy telling me that she had been notified by Admin Girl at Milla's doctor's office that our doctor would not sign off on the form because he had not seen her in over a year. Hmmmm.....he had no problem with not seeing her six months ago and confirming her diagnosis as "developmental delays." But now six months later, he needs to see her in order to sign off???

Why has she not seen him in over a year, you ask? Well, after we began determining that Reiss has autism and that we felt his vaccines played a part in it, we stopped taking Milla to the doctor. If she was not sick, why bother? We didn't want her shot up with the same bunch of crap. And she has never been sick (aside from a spell where she kept vomiting but we were pretty certain that was an intolerance to a particular food and the problematic food has since been eliminated). If you're taking a child to a Well Baby appointment and not getting her/him vaccinated, then what is the purpose?

So this morning I called the doctor's office and told Admin Girl, who answered the phone, my situation and why Milla has not been seen in over a year in their office. I asked if there was any way we could just come in for an appointment and have Milla seen so that the doc could sign off on the form. Without it, we cannot get speech services. And I made sure to include that in my plea.

Admin Girl told me that even if we are no longer vaccinating Milla, she still needs to be seen for Well Child visits so that the doctor can determine whether she is meeting her developmental milestones or has developmental delays present.

I wanted to say, "Um.....excuse me? Do you mean the same developmental milestones that I kept bringing to the doctor's attention every three months when I thought that my son was not hitting them? The same milestones that the doctor reassured me that children reach at different periods and it didn't matter that my son wasn't right on target? The same milestones that we persistently kept bringing to the doctor's attention that we were extremely concerned about and he told us not to worry? Do you mean the same milestones that, when missed, can indicate developmental delays and even autism? Do you mean the same milestones that six months ago, without seeing Milla in person, the doctor signed a form stating she had missed them and had developmental delays present? Those? Are those the same ones? Because, if those are the same ones you're referring to, the doctor missed them altogether with our son and dismissed our concerns and it was only after we began talking to parents of other autistic children that we found that there was concern there all along."

But, of course, I didn't say that.

I politely accepted an offer of an appointment for next week and we'll get our little signature and things in our world will be righty tighty again. And all because of a bunch of bureaucratic paperwork that requires a scribble from a doctor who missed it all the first time around with child number one.

The irony makes me want to vomit.

Now THIS Is Cool!

(Edit: The 3/50 Project site has been having some technical difficulties and clicking on the above may give an error. If that is the case, click HERE.)

By sheer accident, I came across this website while reading some totally unrelated content on another website. The 3/50 Project is basically a grassroots movement to support local businesses and assist them in weathering the storm of this tough economy.

As a person whose entire family's well-being depends on a small family-owned business, supporting local businesses and those of the "Mom & Pop" variety has always been something I try to do, when possible, and take pride in doing.

I won't even try to provide lengthy detail of the process and how we can all help our local businesses. Instead, you can read about it straight from the source. If you choose not to click on the link, "The goal is simple: Ask consumers to frequent three local brick and mortar businesses they don’t want to see disappear, and to spend a very affordable $50 per month doing it."

And if $50 is too much for your budget, create your own 3/$40 or 3/$25 Project or whatever is affordable for you. You will feel good about making such an effort and the business owners whose businesses you frequent will appreciate it. Every little bit counts! So let's get out there and get shopping! Or eating! Or getting our car worked on....or whatever!

Join Me on Facebook for Biomedical Discussions!

This is just a quick heads up to all my bloggie world friends that a few friends and I have created a facebook group called DAN!/Biomedical Parents. If you are interested in joining, the aforementioned boldface words are the exact words you will want to search for when on facebook.

The intent of the group is for those who are using the DAN! protocol or those who are interested in learning more about it to discuss issues relating to the protocol and other biomedical treatment methods used in treating individuals with ASD's.

Here is the fine print, per se. And I hate to have to say it but unfortunately, as my friends and I have found in the past, it is necessary: Currently, the group is set as "open," making it available for any facebook member anywhere in the world to join. If problems should arise with any member or members causing trouble (bashing, criticizing treatment choices of other members, etc.), said members will be booted from the group and the group will be reset as "secret." In the event that the group is changed to secret mode, it will not be searchable on facebook and membership will be by invitation only.

Come join us on facebook and give us an introduction! I look forward to "meeting" all of you!

Swine Flu Vax Is A Moral Obligation???

Really? Seriously?
Read what I'm talking about here.....

Swine Flu Vax 'A Moral Obligation'

I am speechless, yet totally outraged at the same time, by the audacity of these people who are supposed to be "religious leaders" for their labelling the H1N1 vaccination 'a moral obligation.'

Um, no, I don't think so! Plain and simple. Who the you-know-what do they think they are, anyway???

And because I refuse to get off on a tangent and get any madder at these ignorant souls today, this concludes my post for the day, folks!

Enjoy! And don't shoot me....I'm just the messenger.

A (Nearly) Perfect Autumn Day

Today we went to a birthday party for a little boy who is our neighbor and a very good friend. In the last three and a half years, even before the little guy came along, James and I have really gotten to know his mother and father and they are awesome people. By the way, if you click on the link on the right for "The Wellness Philosophy," that is our neighbor's blossoming business.

The birthday party for our little friend was held at a park fairly close to our house. We have been there one other time and didn't think much of it but obviously it was because we did not walk around a whole lot while there. When we went today, we found there was a bridge over a stream that led to what must be miles and miles of cleared away and paved trails. It was an unbelievable surprise, to say the least.

At one point, I was walking along one of the trails with Milla while Reiss and James were over in the playground area and, with all the colorful leaves falling all around us and just being in the middle of it all, it felt like a little slice of Heaven. Being back there surrounded by all the color and beauty of the environment, one would never guess there is the hustle and bustle of a very busy commercial area close by and a very well-travelled street right outside the park's gates. It was refreshing and relaxing and I could have kicked myself for forgetting to bring the camera. The setting provided a perfect opportunity for one of those kinds of photos where a child is pictured from the back wondering amidst falling leaves and those already on the ground. Grrrr! Maybe next week.....

Our neighbor, who has shown great interest in the biomedical treatments we use in treating Reiss' autism, attended one of the DAN! conferences and is now a practicing provider in the DAN! protocol. Because she is so aware of the importance of our GFCF diet, she made a cake especially for us to eat at her own son's birthday party! How cool is that? And although I told her to please do not do anything special for us, I have to admit, that is a true friend!

There were several children at the party and we all played on the playground equipment and walked around (making certain to avoid a very large, very disrespectful pile of dog poo someone failed to dispose of - seriously...what is wrong with people?) and talked and it was just great fun.

There was one time when Milla was making her way up the steps to the slide and I had to seriously restrain myself and now I wish I hadn't but who knows what the consequences would have been had I opened my mouth. Anyway, there was a little girl of about four years old who was trying to get past Milla rather than wait her turn. Her father kept telling her to wait her turn and she kept on trying to get past Milla and the father grabbed her on her chest (like one of her breasts) and squeezed and very angrily told her to wait her turn. She let out a little wail and, although I did see it happen, I didn't need to see it happen to know by her wailing that it hurt pretty badly. Call me a wimp and call me a stereotyper, but I kept my mouth shut because all his tattoos running up and down his arms scared the crap out of me. Now I'm wishing I would have said something....poor little girl. If he does that out in public, I don't even want to think what happens at home when she does something he disapproves of. (SIGH!)

The child abuser was the worst part of my afternoon. Otherwise, things were mostly ideal. The kids played fuss-free for nearly two hours. They were very happy and having fun and probably would have played even longer without any fits but Milla was getting tired and naptime was approaching, so we left. Milla was worn out and was asleep in her carseat as we approached our house.

It doesn't sound like a particularly spectacular day but it was a great Autumn day and one I will remember for a long time.

Something to Ponder This Sunday

Disclaimer: This post includes mention of bodily functions of the #2 kind. If you are easily grossed out or do not see the humor, poo on you.


Poopology, according to Reiss:
If you poop on the potty, that's a poop.
If you poop in your underwear, that's a turd.

Oh, How Autism Changes Your Goals....

Jenn over at Can Mom Be Calm? gave me an idea for a blog post of my own with one of her latest posts. In it, she compares her pre-baby goals to her goals after giving birth. Or rather, to her goals for her children now that she has two children with special needs.

I have been thinking about this a lot lately myself, especially during those times when I am subjected to another parent rambling on about how their child is the best soccer player his school has ever seen. Or how their child is the first in her class to make the fill in the blank with a sport travelling team. Or how about this one (we have all had to listen to someone like this): How the child walked out of the womb and was potty-trained by one year of age.

Okay, maybe that's an exaggeration but you get the point.

As Jenn pointed out in her own post, no matter whether you have a child who is typical or one who has special needs or even one who is extraordinarily gifted, for that matter, once you have a child and reality begins to set in, your goals begin to change so rapidly that you wonder how you were ever so naive to believe things would be the way you imagined them before you had the child.

Here are just a few of my "before" and "after" goals. And if you're new here and the name of this site wasn't enough to clue you in, here's a newsflash: I have a child with autism.

For my child -
Before: My child will not become addicted to television.
After: Please, God, can you get him to watch tv for just five minutes so I can have a break to breathe?

Before: I will not allow any organization (Boy Scouts or other) to base my child's membership eligibility on whether or not he goes out soliciting over-priced merchandise to our neighbors every other week.
After: At some point, I hope my child will "get" the concept of being in an extra-curricular activity.

Before: My child will not be that child in a restaurant who, at say, eight years old, has no table manners and still makes a toddler-size mess.
After: My child will be able sit quietly enough and sit still long enough by say, eight years old, that we can go out to eat as a family without people pointing and staring at us.

Before: My child will not be that child who all the other kindergarten children are whispering about because he peed his pants.
After: (With fingers crossed) My child will not be that child who all the other freshmen are loudly taunting because he peed his pants.

Before: My child will not be the child who gets picked on.
After: My child will almost certainly be the one who gets picked but I hope he can let it roll off his back (or let's hope God is looking out for the child doing the picking on him).

Before: My child will love to read.
After: I hope my child will read at his appropriate grade level.

Before: My child doesn't have to be Mr. Popularity but I hope he has a lot of friends.
After: I hope my child will "get" the concept of friendship soon. It's something we discuss frequently.

For myself -
Before: I will continue to work out and refuse to become a shlumpadinka mama.
After: Does playing waitress to my children and rarely getting a break to sit down count as exercise?

Before: I will not be one of those moms who goes out in public looking like they just got out of bed.
After: I hope I get to brush my teeth today. Getting a shower would be like a slice of Heaven.

Before: My husband and I will plan for college. We will not wonder during our child's senior year how we are going to pay for college.
After: I hope my child will do well in mainstream public school. Attending college would be a totally unexpected and more than welcome bonus.

Before: I will not be that parent...you know, like the one I mentioned before who brags about their child doing everything better than your child and at a younger age.
After: I will put on my best smile and try my darndest to not vomit down the front of that parent's shirt when I have to listen to their meaningless droning.

Enough of my goals. I need to get off here and go help my four-year-old study for the LSAT.