Random Rambling.......

I haven't posted on here in a few days and don't have any earth-shattering stories of progress or failure to report, so this evening is going to be just a bunch of random thoughts expressed by fingers to keyboard.....

First, today has been one in a string of several days hearing about stories of miscarriage and pregnancies amongst the people in my world. An acquaintance with whom I am certain would be a very good friend if the two of us could ever get out together more - I'll call her "H" since I always hate to reveal people's real names - just had a miscarriage. I'm so sad for her right now. She and I are only months apart in age and although I'm not old, by any means, I am considered "high risk" when it comes to pregnancy jargon. It makes me wonder what is to come should there be a #3 or #4 or whatever for us.

On a happier note, there are other friends and acquaintances all around me who are turning up pregnant. I'm pretty certain it's not something in the water because most people I talk to say they filter their water since it's pretty nasty tasting. Maybe it's the weather and people staying inside so much.

This afternoon and evening were a dim reminder of why autism breaks up so many families. A few months back, I read a statistic that said that the divorce rate of marriages in families with one or more autistic children is in excess of 80%. While I will admit to Reiss' autism creating some pretty rough patches in our family at times, we can thank God that it has not gotten that bad for us.

It's so sad how the mood of an entire family can be changed by one child. And before anyone says anything....unless you've been in these shoes, you have no idea. I used to believe that we choose our own moods. As in, one either chooses to be happy or to be sad. I still believe that - to some degree. However, a child with autism can wear a person down so incredibly much - even on an otherwise happy person to a near breaking point.

I don't know where we went wrong with Reiss today...maybe it was nothing at all that we did. He had all his supplements. There were no dietary infractions (that we know of). He did go to preschool today though, and although I have been very clear with his teacher and assistants how important it is that he only eat what we provide, it is unreasonable to expect them to watch him non-stop like a hawk to be sure he is not sneaking a bite of another child's snack. This evening, he would not eat dinner. He kept whining and screaming about something hurting but he wouldn't tell us what was hurting - not that we would have been able to understand anyway, through all the whining. He threw a bit of a tantrum about the coat he needed to wear to go outside and play after dinner. After coming in from outside, he repeatedly ran over Milla's and my bare feet with his Lego truck. He kept singing the "poke her in the eye" song, which is basically saying those words to the tune of "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" or the "The Alphabet Song" - you decide. As a result, we got treated to hearing him scream at the top of his lungs about not wanting to take a break in his room. Come bedtime, I wasn't in the bathroom when it was time to brush teeth but I heard him back there with James screaming about something or other. Whatever......the day is over for him and he is asleep. We can only hope tomorrow brings a better mood for him.

This evening wasn't all about Reiss and his tantrums though....thank goodness! We did have some fun with all of us wrestling around and playing "get" and tickles and chasing one another and peek and all of those other fun little things toddlers love to do that are so easy to get started and keep them entertained for quite some time. Milla is really coming into a cute little girl personality. She has a mean streak in her but overall, she is very sweet. She loves to cuddle with me a LOT.

My husband works with a guy who has a baby girl who is only six weeks younger than Milla. His wife likes to put their baby in the bed with them so that she gets more sleep but he would prefer that she stay in her crib. James was just telling me about this this evening and it really got me thinking - as I often do - that by forcing a child to sleep in a crib, so many people miss out on the joys of co-sleeping: seeing their child sleeping or cuddled up with them or hearing them breathe. I just love those things. It really does not get any better than that. When Reiss was a baby, he would always wake up with a big open-mouthed smile that was just the cutest thing. It was like he was all happy and smiling because he got to wake up next to his Daddy and Mommy. It makes me sad to think that we would have missed that had he been in a crib.

Anyhoo....I'm done rambling and feeling pretty tired. Tomorrow I have to make a trip to the health food store to replenish some supplements. I need to be rested because I need to focus on finding some new items I've done some research on and would like to try.